Buhtt sex?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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