i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
he quoted the bible to break up with me
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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