i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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