once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
3pm strippers are depressing
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
