I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
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