I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
