I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize
