Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
