What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
