This girl is more easily done than said...
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
