You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
