READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize
