You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
