she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
