You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I need to align my fucking chakras
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