She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
