Do you still have your period?
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
