Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I'm always down for nudity.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
