I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize