Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
