That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
