Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
where are my eyebrows?
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