He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Randomize
