You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
i've created a new STD.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
