i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize