my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
its not stalking. its research.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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