saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
