She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Randomize
