Ambien. No doubt about it.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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