You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
