Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
