he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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