Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
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