I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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