i just had sex bonerless
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
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