Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
You ate ashes out of my bong
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
