Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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