is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Everyone says I win the strip club
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Randomize
