That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
She said her name was "party"
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
