Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
