Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I think your dad took our porno
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
