I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
i think i just lost a toe
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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