I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
