Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
