Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
