Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Randomize