so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
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