found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
