I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
