You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
